Randocuisine

 

Randolicious 

Haute cuisine is not typically associated with long distance riding. None of the stars in the All-Star Special at Waffle House or on the Hardee’s sign refer to Michelin. Randonneurs seek fast, inexpensive and voluminous calories. Some long-distance riders can fuel themselves on powdered drinks and gels but I am not one of those. Early on I learned that my engine runs cleanest on real food. During PBP 2003 I had attempted to fuel myself with powdered maltodextrin, and gels but by the end of the day one my gastrointestinal tract had revolted. A rookie experimentation that nearly ended my ride but fortunately I was in France. The food offered at the controls had not been chosen at random. The menu had been cultivated from over 100 years of trial and error. I was grazing at the buffet of Audax savoring the terroir of long miles in the saddle. Slowly I recovered, fueling with mashed potatoes bolognese, riz au lait, pasta and pockets of endless jambon baguettes. I certainly have spent my share of time wandering the aisles of minimarts searching for that perfect flavor of the moment food item that would carry me to the next control. Like many others I have also used fast food restaurants as an efficient source of rando fuel but I’m not here to discuss value menus or happy meals. Let’s take a moment to savor the high gastronomy of Grand Randonnées. I hope you’re hungry. 

 Bonifay Challenge 2006 

 Breakfast was long gone on day one of the Bonifay Challenge. We were 150 miles into the ride crossing from the Florida Panhandle into southern Georgia. Our fuel gauges were reading near empty when an oasis appeared. Michelle’s Restaurant in Georgetown Georgia announced itself with the aroma of fried chicken. Like bloodhounds we followed the scent to a sign that read “daily buffet.” We didn’t need any more information. We just needed plates. Walking the aisles of Michelle’s buffet we were the proverbial kids in a candy store. During my wife Amy’s pregnancies she had unusual cravings. While I could don the pregnancy belt at our Lamaze courses to empathize with the burden of carrying the added weight of a pregnancy, I couldn’t truly understand the cravings until randonneuring. Long miles drain calories and nutrients and those need to be replaced. Michelle was here to help. With heaping plates, we grabbed a table in the outdoor section well away from the other patrons. This feeding frenzy would best be without witness. If there was a theme to my meal, it was yellow. Baked macaroni and cheese, cheesy grits, chicken and dumplings, creamed corn, sweet potato casserole and a corn muffin. As they say in the South, my meal was easy on the gums. No teeth required! Of course, this was washed down with 32 ounces of the sweetest tea this side at the Mason-Dixon line. Some readers will revolt at this plate of good ole Southern cooking but to my stomach this was rocket fuel. 

 LEL 2009 

We would pass through Traquair Scotland twice in relative quick succession at kilometer 680 and then again at 750 after the turnaround. Our initial passing was at the early breakfast hours and I found myself bleary eyed with a bowl of porridge searching for condiments. I was directed to the “condiment” table where I found only Scotch. A kilted man assured me that I was at the correct table but I passed on the suggested wee dram for now. I had my porridge straight up despite hearing about the wonders of the peat filtered Islay on offer. When we returned 4 hours later things were much more festive, and we were awake. The main course for lunch was sheet cake with a side of Scotch. As the saying goes, when in Rome…. I consented to sample the Isaly 10yr and the Glenmorangie. To refuse would have been insulting. The control worker/bartender beamed with pride as he described the notes of flavors that I would be encountering, that is after I finished my second generous serving of birthday cake. It was all washed down with a mini biere d”Or and we headed into the hills and high winds of the borderlands. 

 PBP 2015 Fougeres 

Mention your favorite control at PBP amongst a group of anciens/anciennes and you are well on your way to a spirited debate. I have always favored Villaines La Juhel, particularly for the festive atmosphere on the return but especially for the volunteer children which carry the rider’s trays. In 2015 though Ian Hands made a strong case for Fougeres having the best cuisine. The cafeteria is in a separate building from the control so I had often skipped it. Trust me, a visit to the cafeteria in the lower building is well worth your time. The menu is extensive. Decisions can be difficult for the weary randonneur, particularly with a language barrier. I decided to stick with my tried and true color scheme, this time light yellow. Pasta Carbonara, riz au lait, cold pasta salad, beer and a banana. I felt these nutrients directly entering into my bloodstream somehow bypassing my stomach. Note to self and friends, don’t forget to feed in Fougeres. 

 PBP 2011 Saint Martin des Prés 

Between Loudeac and Saint Nicholas du Pelem there is a small village that goes all out in the celebration of Paris Brest Paris. Saint Martin des Prés should not be missed. Often the route passes through twice although in 2019 it was only visited on the outbound leg. Everyone in town seems to be there. Roadside tents are filled with riders and villagers all seeking their famous Moules Frites. The mussels and fries are both cooked in massive tubs over open flames. Mussels might not seem the safest of in ride foods but they sure are délicieux! They pair well with accordion music and content smiles. Excuse the blurry screen shot of a video of mine from 2011. In 2015 there was a mussel shortage so only frites and sausage were on offer and in 2019 I didn’t study the route closely enough to realize my plan of stopping on the return was flawed. I will be back in 2023 and look forward to the tidal bounty of Saint Martin des Prés, hopefully outbound and inbound. Vive les moules frites! 

 Míle Fáilte 2018 

1200k is a long way to ride so you might as well start with a full Irish. The full Irish breakfast is guaranteed to get you to the first control, unless you are a vegetarian. Vegans and vegetarians may need to supplement. Being omnivorous I absolutely love the full Irish. Rashers (thick Irish bacon) sausage links, fried eggs, beans, black and white pudding, and mushrooms. This will come with coffee/tea, toast and brown bread and probably cereal and it will have you sailing down the road. I try not to experiment with food during an event. If possible I stick with items that have no known conflicts with my digestive tract. US riders may not be familiar with the puddings, particularly the black pudding which is illegal in the US! The puddings are not puddings at all, they are sausages. They have many of the same ingredients as typical sausages with the black pudding containing blood. If you feel a little low on iron, black pudding has you covered. Perhaps we should not further discuss “how the sausage gets made.” 

 Nebraska Sandhills 1000k 2018 

When it comes to hearty breakfasts, the Irish don’t have a monopoly. Day two of the 2018 Nebraska Sandhills 1000k would have riders slogging into a headwind for 90 miles with the only respite at a breakfast stop at the Antelope Creek Café in Gordon Nebraska. I felt like a 777 fueling up for a cross oceanic flight. With sausage patties the size of hamburgers you’d better have two. No, make it three because one comes on your side breakfast sandwich! Eggs, toast, hash browns, two jelly packets, coffee and a coke. Stops can be few and far in between in Nebraska but don’t worry because they really know how to fill up your tank. 

 PBP 2015 Sizun 

Photo - Jenny Oh

Honorable Mention goes to a bakery in Sizun, since it was just one item rather than a meal. It is just off the main court in everyone’s favorite non-control town of PBP. You’ve gotten over the Roc’h Trevezel and it’s always a good time to stop in Sizun. It’s a lively place. Nearly everyone stops. In the Boulangerie/Patisserie just behind the ruins I scored the tastiest item that I have ever encountered on a ride. I was seeking the Breton delicacy the Kouign Amann but they were all out, all out of the individual ones that is. They had a 10” family size version. Oui oui indeed. The name derives from the Breton words for cake (kouign) and butter (amann). It literally is 50% yeasted dough and 50% butter… and 50% caramelized sugar. Don’t ask how they get 150% into this thing, just enjoy. Mademoiselle boxed it up and I took it outside drooling like one of Pavlov’s dogs. My riding buddies asked what plans I had for such a large pastry but I was only speaking in tongues at this point. Tongues dripping with butter and caramelized sugar that is. Once my eyes had rolled back into my head the vultures saw the open door, or box, and swept in for a bite. Oh my was all we could muster until we rolled across the Albert-Louppe Bridge in Brest. Randonneurs love riding their bikes a long way, and many of us also love food. Coincidence, or cause and effect? Whatever your motivation for long distance riding you will require fuel. Figure out what works for you, particularly over 3-4 days. Keep your eyes open and your nose in the air for that lurking rando cuisine. Perhaps your family sized Kouign Amann is out there just around the next corner. Bon Appetit!